Lessons from The Bachelor

My friend Jenn and I love watching The Bachelor. It is our Monday night guilty, girly pleasure. The thing I notice most about this show, though, is the intense belief of these people that a relationship will bring significance, wholeness, and meaning to their lives. They are looking for relationships to give them fulfillment that only God can give. Too many Christians say things like this flippantly, and I don’t mean it that way at all, and I’m not judging – I, too, have been guilty of expecting relationships to fill places that only God should fill.

Though I’ve been through long periods of singleness (and sometimes loneliness in that area of my life), I have never been the girl who expected a romantic relationship to fill God’s shoes in my life. My parents did a great job of teaching me not to look for my own value in a romantic relationship. However, God did bless me with an amazing group of Christian friends in college, and I know there were times when I expected their friendship to fulfill me in areas where only God was capable of bringing completeness. There were times when I was sad or upset and I ran immediately to my girlfriends instead of to God – the only one who could really understand a situation or the depth of my hurt. People are just that – people. They are human and limited in knowledge and understanding, and they disappoint. I disappoint those I love. It is a causality of being human.

The amazing thing is that we serve a God who does not disappoint. I wish I could tell some of those Bachelor girls that good news when they go home crying at the end of an episode. I know heartbreak will still sting, but it is so nice for me to know that even in the midst of heartache, I serve a Lord who is working all things together for my good.