On Humility

My brother, JT, has a fun tradition of inviting all his friends to my parent’s house for the 4^th of July.  Literally – all his friends.  This year, we packed people on every available sleeping space and one of the girls declared it a giant sleepover.  She was so right.  Andy and I don’t always get to be part of the celebration because we also try to celebrate with his family, but this year we went.  Here is the thing about JT and Grace’s friends.  They are really, really smart and really, really talented.  Just like JT and Grace.  And I’m not exaggerating.  They are well traveled and the majority of the group at the house on Thursday had actually lived and worked overseas.  They are well educated with impressive backgrounds and degrees.  They all have fantastic, cool, awesome jobs (at least from my perspective!), AND they are all under 30.  But here is the absolute best thing about this group and the part that impressed me most – they are unbelievably humble.  In fact, I guarantee that if any of them are reading this post right now, they are already embarrassed by my praise and hoping I won’t mention them by name.  Don’t worry, guys, I won’t (I did, however, add your picture to this blog because pictures make words more interesting).

 

My conversations with some of them have made me think more about humility this week.  I had one conversation with one of the girls in the group who, in my opinion, exudes humility, and we talked about work and priorities and balance.  Somehow we got to talking about how hard it is to balance work requirements with a desire to spend our time in other pursuits –with family and friends or personal care (like exercise).  She perfectly articulated the problem when she mentioned how talent or effort at work is rewarded – if not in words then usually in respect or a promotion or raise – but there isn’t much praise or recognition for people working to build relationships, for example.  I think about women who choose to stay home with their children to raise them according to God’s word.  There isn’t much praise for that job.  And if I’m being perfectly honest, it is a lifestyle that even I criticize at times. Two nights ago, I was actually venting to my husband about a woman I’ve never even met who went to college, got a degree, and never used it because she chose to stay home to better support her husband and then children.  I was doing that!  And I would love to be able to stay home and pour into our children when we have them because I believe that no one can teach them to love Jesus better than Andy and I can. And I have friends that show me daily what an amazing sacrifice it is to be at home full time with children.  What is wrong with me that I was criticizing that unknown woman?  What is wrong with me that I thought using a degree was more important than pouring into her family?

 

I think that in my heart has been fooled into believing the lie that earthly wisdom and ambition matter.  I have allowed myself to become prideful in my pursuit of those things – if not outwardly, at least inwardly. 1 Corinthians 3:18-19 says, “Do not deceive yourselves.  If any of you think you are wise by the standards of this age, you should become “fools” so that you may become wise.  For the wisdom of this world is foolishness in God’s sight.”  This is the thing.  We aren’t all that smart or impressive.  Just when I think I’m a rock star, I meet another teacher who is a million times more impressive in her career than I am.  And even if I was the most impressive, most talented, most intelligent person on earth, God would still look at me and laugh.  The “wisdom” of this world is foolishness in his sight.  That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t work or pursue earthly goals like education and career.  It just means that we should keep life in perspective – true wisdom is not in earthly knowledge because I am one tiny human on one tiny planet in in galaxy of many galaxies.  We are nothing in the scheme of the whole world.  True wisdom comes from the one who is greater than the entire universe – The Lord God.

 

Psalm 111:10 says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow his precepts have good understanding.  To him belongs eternal praise.”  When JT’s friend and I were discussing priorities at the lake, she was, in my opinion, a beautiful example of what a balance of priorities should be.  She could have been finding her worth in her cool job, impressive background, and unique past experiences.  She could have been bragging about what she has done and where she wants to go in her career.  Instead, she was talking to me about the importance of finding balance – of making time for the people in her life that she loves and showing other people that they are important.  You see, I can’t readily think of anywhere in the Bible that talks about furthering our career goals, but I can off-hand think of LOTS of scriptures about loving our neighbor, serving the poor, engaging with our families, seeking the Lord.  I think humility looks like my new friend at the lake and the stay at home moms I know.  It looks like engaging in a God-centered perspective – even when it is a struggle.  It looks like being unimpressed with ourselves and our “accomplishments” and more interested in making a difference for the Lord in the lives of those around us.  It looks like prioritizing our time to place God and his desires ahead of our own.  Even when it hurts.  Even when it is tiring.  Even when it doesn’t feel rewarding.  That is what humility looks like.